yep i think i’m dizzy// from the use of spraypaint in a closed room

time’s a set of firetruck-red switches,
tucked in rows of four against the wall
“DHL express to China”
———————–i wave
————-nods the lady with giraffe-long legs
smiling gently from the ceiling

————i would say
if someone asks how i work// or paint
&even cook or–

catch me         //     (with) both hands
grab the hen

spill like neuschnee in my uncle’s yard
she freezes in his arms //at last
her eyes dart//black
lunatic flashlights

“slow down”
—————–says the stream
&i’m a heap of fishscales,
drifting on the waves
cramming coins
into the parking meters metal cleft
my earplugs
and james blunt
pliNgpLinG// guitar
put my thumbs
along the song’s vibrating spine, massaging

“can you send the tracking code?” i ask the giraffe
&she waves her black&yellow head
legs pinned firmly to the center of a countrymap
i don’t know the outlines of/ yet–

“mom, i’m eating something”
“want my company?”
“what ya doing?”

i spraypaint one last silhouette on the wooden board,
leaned against a cappuccino colored wall,
against a boy with downy hair
breathing yellow tinted cotton candy balls
into the night
that leans
into the moon /a tree/against a leaf

a rose

that just starts climbing


todays theme at dVerse is “flashbacks”


31 responses to “yep i think i’m dizzy// from the use of spraypaint in a closed room

  1. This is just excellent.. I knew you were going to ace on flashbacks.. somehow the connection between the neushnee (which should be the same as nysnö), virgin white to the color of the spraypaint is in itself a metaphor of growing up… Wonderful connection to the prompt.

  2. Sometimes we get going too fast – and we forget to experience the moment. It is good we have those streams to remind us. Ha. I like the flashback to the chicken and even when held, the eyes are still frantic. And I think in slowing down, we can appreciate the others in our life all the more. Savor, I think is a good word.

  3. I like the way your poem wanders from scene to scene, past to present and even a bit of fantasy (giraffe) in the mix. I really like the ending…with the rose just starting to climb!

  4. And truly, I felt as if those fumes had me going as well. I always enjoy when you put that little boy in your poem, this time breathing out pink cotton balls. Wonder graffiti of a poem….quick, quick, quick! But, need to slow down and savor as well or that chicken is going to go ballistic in the arms.

  5. Wow, slow down, what a kaleidoscope of actions, words, characters… and fumes! As always, I love the contrast between the mundane conversations/direct speech and the fantastical elements you discover. The giraffe-long legs metamorphosing into a real giraffe nodding her black and yellow head… love that!

  6. There is so much here that I do not know where to start. I like the to-and-fro movement between past and present and the insertion of dialogue too, so that in the end the borders between reality and memory are blurred and we feel as if we too had smelled that spray paint.

  7. I love this:

    “and james blunt
    pliNgpLinG// guitar
    put my thumbs
    along the song’s vibrating spine, massaging”

    And from here down: “i spraypaint one last silhouette”

  8. I really admire how you painted time as fast – firetruck red switches to slowing down – drifting on the waves ~ Lovely painting and ending verses as well ~

  9. Vivid painting and characters appear so unpredictably that I have a desire while reading to turn the neck to see who is she/he/it?

  10. This is so wonderful… all the scenes have been depicted so vividly.. actually became lost & absorbed for a good few minutes! Well penned 😀

  11. Oh.. no the complicated realities of a culture and responsibilities so complex that there is never time to see the forest for the trees.. and for me.. it brings back memories of decades of work life and duty bound home life worlds.. where the only time to reflect on who i even am as a human soul.. are on bi-annual journeys in transit to see family members across state.. and the occasional hurricane that shuts down the information overload of a culture gone truly insane.. ah.. i escape now.. into the best of times now..:)

  12. I especially love the closing……”into the night
    that leans
    into the moon /a tree/against a leaf

    a rose

    that just starts climbing” Wonderful!

  13. What a cool take on the prompt; I love the giraffe lady and the parking meters with the metal cleft…and the leaning into the night, moon, and climbing, RAMBLING, perhaps, rose!

  14. The inclusion of neuschnee was a brilliant move. I loved the way your poem wove itself into tidy, little knots, taking us through different stages of your life. 🙂

    Greetings from London.

  15. …spray paint sure can do this to you, but so does oil paint … I know … almost set my house in fire and caboom … after experimenting with oil and turpentine and … things … by candle light … ya … Love, cat.

  16. I love the way that you describe people in unusual, but somehow perfect similes…I can just imagine that lady with giraffe-long legs. Smiles.