there’s probably no decent number for this call

i’m not yet there, the dust of roads
i’ve been,
of fear, the scaffolds way too brittle that they’d hold
my fall,

a step forward,
three back, crashing through the net
life knots with rough hands
the base

shakes dangerously

in search of water for this plant

my first guitar, pen, brush
a million firsts
&craShes.

the machine’s hum as i sew my first pants
&the seams are paths into a land

i haven’t seen yet
thrill
i want invent//create
give birth with cooking spoon&paint,
needle&thread,
a chord, a smile,
a single word–

&i don’t aim
for being perfect
i don’t aim (laLa)
for fame

just wanna be

the brave inventor of a melody
in verse, or tune, or shades, in you
that creeps under your breath
&makes you

wanna dance to

.

vocation is the theme for today’s poetics at dVerse

32 responses to “there’s probably no decent number for this call

  1. It must at first be a thrill, a rush, when someone writes, produces a hit song; but they must tire of it 10 years later when that is all their public wants to hear. I visited with old theater friends recently, & one of them mentioned that my performance of Macduff in MACBETH in 1972 was the best performance of that part that she has ever seen; what a sweet shock to hear that.

  2. I love your outlook here, Claudia…. continuing to SEEK one’s vocation / call, always yearning to create – to do – something unique. That way you will really never ‘age,’ Claudia….never be one who says ‘I am finished & it is time for the rocking chair now,’ but will keep fresh and searching wherever passion calls you.

  3. Claudia, this is one of my favorite poem of yours. Smiles. When we no longer fear the crashes this is when we can feel really free and are able to achieve many things. These crashes, they will happen – probably more than once – but they are not the whole story.

  4. That ending leaves me very excited and uplifted ~ Love this part Claudia:

    i want invent//create
    give birth with cooking spoon&paint,
    needle&thread,
    a chord, a smile,
    a single word–

  5. So much passion for creativity flowing out of this poem … it’s a marvellous piece of work .. love the brittle scaffold, life’s net of knots and the stanza beginning ‘I haven’t seen yet’ is particularly strong

  6. I love this. How cool that you do all those things, without need for perfection, just to be you. I thoroughly get that you like to experience life and learn. That’s all there is to fully living. Keep doing more Claudia. Btw – your painting is awesome.

  7. “&i don’t aim
    for being perfect
    i don’t aim (laLa)
    for fame
    just wanna be
    the brave inventor of a melody
    in verse, or tune, or shades, in you
    that creeps under your breath
    &makes you
    wanna dance to”

    —i will echo these lines, Claudia, so perfectly well said!

  8. “i don’t aim for being perfect, i don’t aim for fame”…great perspective, Claudia
    -but you ARE “famous” here at d’Verse 🙂

  9. What a wonderful description of life… And what (to me) sums it up is your line “in search of water for this plant”. By “water” I feel you said anything that inspires, that fulfills, that nourishes and the plant is anyone. I think we are all searching for that water (and sometimes the search itself can be fun :-)).

  10. The desire to be perfect can create masters, but for most, it holds them back from enjoying all the great pleasures in sampling our imperfect abilities and loves.
    Well said

  11. @ claudia:
    My reply to your comment on my blog:

    Wouldn’t you imagine it more painful to think you have some divine purpose but never found it or fulfilled it? What a horrible burden that view has.

    Your poem above actually matches better a view that there is no divine purpose and that it is OK not to be perfect, to find the perfect purpose — but instead to play and enjoy the freedom inherent of what is.

  12. Ah.. yeS!.. inspiration is often in the steps of dance not walked before haha! a great delight it is to paint in brush.. where no brush dares.. to go before.. in dance of night a light a like.. inspiring fire of creativity in painted life anew a jewel..Bright eyes of never before now aSkew!..:)

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