i’ve got you in my radar ducks//just– i should hike the PCT maybe–

on the train to munich

on the train to munich

we got our fingers down the throat of–
&i swallow, having to confess that
at the end of me// the day//the month//a biz trip
or of anything
i’m a platform atheist, 110%

it’s Munich this time
trains race by

causing weird whisps of wind to push me//back&forth&
for a moment i wish back my curls, yet more than anything
i step into a story

&amazon says
pleaSe choose your deVice&

let’s touch base about this
from the get-go
361 degree//see?
i miss every second stop
&when my eyes give in, i sketch

the business man with a blue tie,
talking Lotus Notes
ina sprinkling-magic voice
the guy across the aisle, reading a mag
his colleague’s eyes
strayed// far out of the window

a “in many ways&not so much strategic” staircase
step by step with endless blistered feet, flesh rubbed raw
from walking to //or from//
&i feel close/ly leverage/d
dizZy from cascading paradigm shifts
existing only in the deep folds of–

i feel her
every word that lays, stitched&bleeding like a quilt
in itching patcHes
‘round my hips

i hate my dad//just for a second
for not loving me the way he should have
how things probably had changed, and i take out my pen
having no words
in me
but lines

and marks to set
one foot before the next
living the values in that space between the cracks
between the throwing overboard
“you can’t move out after you painted everything”

and fill ‘em
looping back//my ice axe forced into the snow, defying gravity
with things i find
along the lines
of tracks that roll their eyes in endless
whispering rows


for MTB today Tony brings Jargon, Buzzwords and Management-Speak to the pub… so give it a try…? doors open at 3pm EST…


30 responses to “i’ve got you in my radar ducks//just– i should hike the PCT maybe–

  1. ah, i like the curls but the new do is pretty kickin’…smiles.
    the feeling you get coming off her…that is the danger in openig yourself up to read others…living the values in the space between the cracks…i like that line much…but hey wake up before you miss your stop…smiles.

  2. There’s a lot in here. Free flowing thoughts combine to create a sense of angst, while belonging to the world that rushes by. And you do what’s expected – work, commute and can’t move out after you’ve just painted. I felt a lot of depth to this one. Wish I could sketch.

  3. You certainly know how to make the best of a train journey, Claudia. I am still too shy about sketching outside and have only done it once, at a launderette. At least I could hide behind the big washing machines. Smiles.

  4. I think being on a train for a long time would inspire a lot of thoughts! And, nice that you have your sketchbook with you (and I always enjoy your sketches). I like “things i find
    along the lines
    of tracks that roll their eyes in endless
    whispering rows”
    and you have found so much!

  5. Ah heck, Claudia, you get the “rock the prompt prize” right out of the gate, as buzzwords/jargon/corporate speak fall from your lines like maple leaves in the autumn wind; a terrific poem that is not hindered in the slightest by working within the parameters of Tony’s challenge. The PCT awaits you atop the Sierra Madre/Cascade chain. Like your lines /I feel her/every word that lays, stitched&bleeding like a quilt/in itchy patches/’round my hips/.

  6. ‘i’m a platform atheist, 110% ‘ – struck me first…and this train observation – very cool…paradigm world and lines about cracks …sketching and living them…almost swallowing …very moving and warm x

  7. I enjoyed following your thoughts on your train trip – you do management speak very well! Love the sketch too. I most love “living the values in that space between the cracks”.

  8. I love the way you’ve woven the business jargon into this so naturally – it’s almost as though it is part of your every-day life. And the the thoughts fall into each other, sometimes not quite complete before the next one arrives … and the way you’ve used “platform atheist” is really clever … smiles

  9. I really liked it. Your thoughts streamlined in the curvature of the imagery of your words is wonderful.The main line for me that summarizes it all was: “I step into a story…”

  10. i like how you meshed some code type of writing with shortening for texts or tweets. And the 110% which is a non-existent concept, but they like to use it all the time.

  11. I knew it would be quite the ride when you hit the platform..”let’s touch base on this” I can’t tell you how many times I have heard that in the workplace..along with “core values and best practices”. A great work jargon cocktail you have created.

  12. Wondering how much are those management speak really taken the way they are intended. Much of the time these terminology circulate among those of similar vintage and may not have the same impact on everyone. Great lines Claudia!