tonight i found a pea under my mattresses – and yes // i woke wrecked

Posted on by claudia

morning, with blue eyes
balances along the windowsill,
a dancer
among birdsong
& the soft wink a hill makes

my jaw still aches

from a 3 hour dentist marathon
he – bent over me//drill in hand
pressing fists against the left part of my face
to gain stability
& suddenly
a mind-flash//
scratching razor blade skates
i won’t have sex

for quite some time
and yes
it bothers me//

“ok – now close your mouth//bite on this strip”
my nerve aches
and the birds take to their trumpets

“you’ve been added
to the oxford sketchers FB group”

cool,
i browse through pages

“why are there so many architects that sketch?”
i wonder

is it for ideas?
to get a sense how line feels
as it grows under your pen’s breath,
re-defining space
that you can co-develop
or for crooked bends in a straight job

“psshh be quiet” i say to the birds
“it’s not yet 5
or help me sort the peas/grain— ?”

“you get all your fairy tales mixed up”

a nut
falls to the ground,
a dress wells out,
a white horse,
ash smeared on my cheeks

“hey” the morning twinkle-smiles

and i accept the group invite
but haven’t
introduced myself //yet

.

Karin has us write slant rhyme at dVerse today… doors open at 3pm EST

37 responses to “tonight i found a pea under my mattresses – and yes // i woke wrecked”

  1. After reading your poem, I am glad I have good teeth and hardly ever go to the dentist’s, except to have my teeth cleaned. Cool that you ave been added to oxford sketchers FB group. It is such a beautiful place that I am sure they have some great sketches.

  2. Wow, three hours in the dentists’ office would be hard to bear. One would have to do different things to get one’s mind to wander elsewhere….and very nice that you are added to the Oxford Sketchers FB group. I have been looking around at the Sketcher sites too. Who knows… And, I hope that the dental paid doesn’t last long!

  3. first, i am cringing at the dentist…that is never good for me…just saying…i think i have ptsd from my childhood dentist named dr malice….to lose that intimacy is hard….love the lines as you are describing what sketching is like…i think a creative outlet would be a good thing for an architect…its life breaking form you know…ha….cool on the sketches…and the end makes me wonder if you are sure yet how to intro yourself…but you will…

  4. ouch – fun rhythm – I suppose this poem is a way to make lemonade out of a lemon. You seem to have a positive outlook which colors your art

  5. Some great lines here that I would love to “borrow or steal” and take for a walk. However, I will leave the references to dental visits for a masochistic period…
    Congrats on the Oxford Sketchers link up. It shows they have good taste.

  8. An incredible share, & your insert of the slant rhymes seems effortless; perhaps some of us already within blank verse, have used that technique instinctively. I try to avoid the sing-song of rhyming couplets, unless called for by a MTB prompt, but at times they just sneak in, like 2 rhyming words in one line, just word butterflies bursting from clover; kudos on the new FB contact/networking/joining.

  9. After so much time in the dentist chair…I’m surprised you could notice what else was going on around you…hope all is well now.

  12. Argh – I’ve spent days with the dentist – not because I have poor teeth, but because of the years of teeth realignment, removal and other brutal work I had to have done as a teenager. Still, it was worth it! I loved how you danced us through your experiences – wonderful and stressful both! Hope all is well now! 🙂

  14. I hate dentists…but I fear I shall have to go back sooner than I had hoped. By the way, getting fairy tales mixed up seems to be the popular thing to do these days, so you are completely in style with that! 🙂

  18. Blah to the dumb dentist, had one I’d like to take a drill upside the head too lol 3 hours though, and sex has to go? Geez the pea has better luck lol

  20. How I love finding niblets of fairytales anywhere! And the morning of blue eyes dancing on the windowsill!! Bettelheim said that surviving pain is one of the uses of enchantment, and that truly fits the mix of reality and fantasy in this poem.

  23. There’s something wonderful about slant rhymes. One either notices them and feels superior, or one has them pointed out and says “Oh, yeah…”

  24. Rather gruesome details at the dentist, but I love the way you evoke that coolness and freshness of the early morning, the birds annoying you, the way you mix up your fairytales, but above all that first stanza
    morning, with blue eyes
    balances along the windowsill,
    a dancer
    among birdsong
    & the soft wink a hill makes
    Absolutely perfect!

  25. I just got lost in your poem, didn’t notice rhymes until later …and I think it’s great when the poem transcends the techniques. 🙂

  27. Oh, the day after dental procedures. It sure made you mix your tales, and your work, in a delightful day. Get some more sleep.
    Loved your description of what sketching is like – that was a great stanza, Princess Claudia, which I was going to say even before I saw the above comment 😉
    Tina @ Life is Good

  28. Ugh. I’m still recovering from the trauma of a three hour dental procedure too. It was awful. I like your description of the morning and sketching. What a beautiful imagination you have. Congratulations on joining the FB group.

  30. A lovely meandering stream of consciousness sort of piece, Claudia. Some beautiful, and also some gritty and harrowing, some simply matter of fact descriptions and elements, all very effective. Enjoyed it.

  35. Love this:
    “a dancer
    among birdsong
    & the soft wink a hill makes”

    And this:
    “and the birds take to their trumpets”

    And your close:
    “i accept the group invite
    but haven’t
    introduced myself //yet”

  36. Happily, our visits to the dentist have always been a pleasant experience (not counting the ones when I was a child though). 🙂
    I like your bit of social media commentary. Yeah, I have done done several times.