no swans for me //please

smell the mountains on my forehead
(just above the sunglass rim)
when we walk uP/upHill,
backs pressed to castle walls,

the ghosts of kings, queens, jesters,
mad men– fairy tales,
swallowed
whole & washed

down
with a glass of water from the lake
(ya see it– whisper?) tales–

of winter emptiness, preparing to contain
the snow melt in its rocky chest,
we walk the shores, explore–
rub glittering fish scales on our skin,
pink pearls
(like secret breadcrumb codes)

(who will find ’em?)–
i lean in, taste raindrops sing
& bungee jump
(crazy! high!) from a forged bridge,

spiN, sPin,
 ——&tuM
———–Ble– blindFolded

in the night,
embrace it–

if it cares hold us
in black satin sky while stars line–up– beads
you’ll adorn my neck with,

later–

.

over at dVerse, Victoria has us looking at “synesthesia” in poetry–where you mix up sensory sensations such as “tasting a rainbow.” – see you at 3pm EST..

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50 responses to “no swans for me //please

  1. Claudia- I don’t know how you do it, but you do it beautifully. This is sensory heaven. The last stanza really left me wanting more:

    if it cares hold us
    in black satin sky while stars line–up– beads
    you’ll adorn my neck with,

    later–

    Wonderful depiction of the night sky. =) -Mike

  2. first, the smell of mountains is a wonderful thing…smiles. like the play with up and down as well….castles are always a perk and i am rather fond of the jesters…who will find the breadcrumb codes kinda jumps out in the middle…and i like the bit of craziness…have rappeled but not bungeed…hmmm, might need to…smiles.nice sensual note to end on as well..

  3. Following Briam M’s excellent analyzation I have nothing more–esp at end of long day. I am IN the mountains, enjoying the smells and tomorrow, “…the walk uP/upHill…” (and I, carried out on a stratcher…” HAHA!

    Bungee, not for ME-ME!

    But Claudia’s writing:
    I ENJOY AT HOME AND AWAY FROM HOME,
    HERE, THERE, and everywhere!

    • “smell the mountains on my forehead
      (just above the sunglass rim)
      when we walk uP/upHill…”

      The mind Of a poet…The beautiful words Of a poet…I like your use Of … sensory and sensations.
      Thanks, for sharing!
      deedee 🙂

  4. Claudia, it has just now occurred to me that you OFTEN use synesthesia in your poetry. It just seems to flow naturally from you. This poem is no exception. I especially like this stanza in your poem today:

    who will find ‘em?)–
    i lean in, taste raindrops sing
    & bungee jump
    (crazy! high!) from a forged bridge

  5. Synesthesia sounds like a disorder of the brain. If it is so, I diagnose you with it but hope there is no cure. I know no one who can mix the senses in a way that makes one feel them as never before -except you. I loved reading this. It was a treat to FEEL nature in your words.

  6. this really is the perfect prompt for you! I think if music were ‘seen’ as opposed to being ‘heard’, I would describe your poems as symphonies.

  7. Brilliant, beautiful take on the prompt, Claudia. You have my senses tingling. I’m not so sure about the fish scales, though I suppose they would make a great exfoliatory product! :0)

  8. Clearly, synesthesia has been, and continues to be your medium, and of the gaggle of international dVerse poets, you seem to be the most “sensual”, creating heat our of icicles, fomenting fecundity from mundane realms, always on the move, reinventing the overlapping spheres you traipse through, reassigning those sensory triggers with new identities, making symbolism into lace; love your work; love you.

  9. beautiful, Claudia. the first line made me chuckle – the ending made me sigh. the ‘in between’… marvellous. loved the pink pearls… wonderful work

  10. mesmerizing. overall lovely, but still I’m torn between the image of “the snow melt in its rocky chest” and the idea of “while stars line–up– beads / you’ll adorn my neck with, // later.”

  11. Oh wow. I love these:

    “tales–

    of winter emptiness, preparing to contain
    the snow melt in its rocky chest”

    “rub glittering fish scales on our skin,
    pink pearls”

    “in black satin sky while stars line–up– beads”

    But oh my, this is my favorite:

    “you’ll adorn my neck with,
    later–”

  12. …Claudia, you & your poetry are def no stranger in this kind of technique… your starting line with that smell of mountains.. is excellent… just felt a bit short t’wards your end…. smiles… enjoyed this!

  13. “tales–

    of winter emptiness, preparing to contain
    the snow melt in its rocky chest,”

    Such a contrast to the rich color of Spring which surrounds us today. Lovely.

  14. These words are priceless: “rub glittering fish scales on our skin,
    pink pearls.” They make me wish to really rub those scales upon my skin – then look for pink pearls. More beautiful poetry Claudia, more exquisite words.

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