it could be Venice or just anywhere

it’s cold & rains as i arrive,
hand luggage only,
traveling light &
i get caught by fog
that brings me to the edge

of things that matter, wheels
spin in the dark,
thick raindrops
seep into the collar
of my coat and colored light bulbs
lay a trail i caNnot follow,

candy cotton threads
glisten like wet cobwebs
on your lips, silence
in the corners of your mouth,
& chains of light go

ploP– Plop– pLop–

shut one after the other
until darkness wins &

distance, measured
with a smile, stretches
like blue bridges on canals,
cuts space in tiny bits
“keep spiN-ninG”
says the music, carrying froth

upon a shore i lost, the absence
of the scents is
what scares me most,
a fortune tellers booth
shut empty, rolled down blinds
“i’m not afrAid” i
whisPer &

giant muscles of
the ferris wheels’ long limbs
crack as it starts rotating, slowly,
sloWly, like someone
whose not quite sure
which way to turn

.

i’ll be selling tickets and illusions at dVerse today and we’re serving candy apples, popcorn and the one or other roller coaster ride…so..hope to see you at 3pm EST when we put on the lights and the wheels start turning….

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50 responses to “it could be Venice or just anywhere

  1. That defining line between where we find or lose ourselves frightens, for sure. The important thing is to maintain a continuous awareness of its closeness without crossing into total loss. For health of spiritual life, I believe, we must return here for self regeneration. To do do is always fraught with danger and terror. How we choose to live with its presence always defines us as we make our never finished trek thru life. It’s important that poetry makes us aware of the crisis point, otherwise it is often just window dressing.

  2. This is lovely, Claudia, the sense of disconnection in a place so artificial, where even its planned movement feels rather arbitrary–and sweetness becomes like cobwebs. It worked very well I thought. k.

  3. so many beautifully done lines, all bringing round the moment of not knowing, even the fortune teller’s shut her advice-for-pay booth down, wow, now that’s scary 😉

    images i really liked,

    “caught by fog
    that brings me to the edge

    of things that matter”

    and

    “giant muscles of
    the ferris wheels’ long limbs
    crack as it starts rotating, slowly”

    but knowing not knowing which way to turn, though a bummer, is better, i think, than not knowing that’s what’s happening, and that’s what i see happening in your poem; sharing with us the feeling of being in-between, “caught by fog”

    yea, very nice claudia, thanks so much 😉

  4. these journeys…trips…TRIPS…take us through the emotion of motion….a turn or a glance tells of a chance…a straw needing our grasp…..always enjoyable riding along with you C

    Peace

  5. There’s so much to enjoy in this. I particularly liked:
    candy cotton threads
    glisten like wet cobwebs
    on your lips

    and then the strings of light – great images these evoked.

  6. Oh, my — the fortune teller’s booth empty? One can only wonder at the story behind that! And the ferris wheel arms cracking as they turn – every rider’s nightmare. Nice capture, Claudia.

  7. i was having a hard time coming up with the word for it but disconnection works…the absence of scents kinda drew me up short as i am rather a fan of smell and the twexture it brings…i like the sounds as well in your words…the fortune teller booth plays well as well, the unknown future…but i like the fact that you are facing it unafraid…smile.s

  8. This poem left me with an uneasy, disjointed kind of feeling. Lots of unanswered questions in the images you’ve put forth, but the search for those answers is how we figure out which way to turn. Wonderfully written, Claudia!

  9. Quite the fair you put into play here on display, and yeah travel light then you can run from those that cause a fright with ease..haha

  10. I had memories of walking a street carnival in the rain…and my to-this-day fear of ferris wheels…another brilliant write my friend.

  11. As ever I’m getting a lot of atmosphere here, Claudia. At first I just thought ‘wet day at the seaside’, and I can’t think of too many more depressing places to be! There is something undeniably tacky about seasides (most English ones at any rate!), made strange in bad weather. But this seems to go deeper than that – great lines. And that creature of a ferris wheel towards the end… 🙂

  12. I agree with David…tons of atmosphere. The way you use upper case is cool. For this read I let it influence emphasis and wow! Look forward to the prompt. Have to go to a meeting this morning (an author’s group) but hope to write something when I get back…maybe during the meeting if it’s boring. (I don’t like meetings…had enough of them in my previous life). Happy Weekend, my friend.

  13. I also loved this:
    candy cotton threads
    glisten like wet cobwebs
    on your lips, silence
    in the corners of your mouth,

    A thrill a minute. Apprehension in this and yet, excitement too. All the fun of the fair 🙂

  14. Really great piece Claudia, quite the trip. those last two stanzas are perfect. Thanks, loved this.

  15. … could be Amsterdam … could be Budapest … let’s go, C … we’ll find it … meet you at the corner? 🙂

  16. These are the sections that grab me and twist me up:

    “thick raindrops
    seep into the collar
    of my coat and colored light bulbs
    lay a trail i caNnot follow” … This is an excellent way to describe the type of rain and how it made you feel.

    “candy cotton threads
    glisten like wet cobwebs
    on your lips” … Wow. Those sound like tasty lips.

    “until darkness wins &
    distance, measured”

    “giant muscles of
    the ferris wheels’ long limbs
    crack as it starts rotating, slowly,
    sloWly, like someone
    whose not quite sure
    which way to turn”

  17. This reminds me of a movie I saw years ago in black and white about a haunted carnival and a ghost from it that would appear in the passenger seat of a man’s car as he was driving, but when he’d look again, would be gone. Lots of dark atmosphere on the flip side of the midway.

  18. Fortune teller not on the job: pity.
    You’ll have to make it up as you go along 🙂
    Lovely jumbled mix. Must be contagious.

  19. I can see the litter of a party long done, and those few who wait behind to fix the fences of life…like bubblegum wrappers blowing on an empty boardwalk, where the fun has lost to fear…and only some of the pretty lights twinkle…amazing depth, and a hell of a write, Claudia…not to mention a sincere thank you for bringing a prompt that lifted my spirits immensely!

  20. I have to agree with the others and say I loved the candy cotton threads glistening, great line, but even better than that was a vivid and atmospheric piece that gave all of the sickly sweet of a fairground a slightly eerie feel…. Or at least that how I read it in parts. Excellent!

  21. I was reminded of films featuring deserted or haunted carnivals.Carnivals, like clowns can turn fun images into scary ones.

  22. “Candy cotton threads glisten like wet cobwebs on your lip” loved this line – and the accentuation with Caps and read it the same how many different ways I read the word Plop .. got a sense of dark and mystery .. the missing fortune teller .. ‘brought to the edge’ ‘not sure which way to turn’ – seeking answers to questions left unanswered .. such a gripping and intriguing write Claudia .. Brilliance – hugs Lib

  23. There’s such a sense of “otherness here,”
    especially in the line…
    “colored light bulbs lay a trail i caNnot follow,”
    I followed this poem oh so well!

  24. the fortune teller, now that is scary! I forgot the beginning of this pub night and the ferris wheel, always out first. great poem claudia!

  25. V interesting use of CaPs but I’m getting used to that now 🙂 I like your willingness to experiment with written word. Great take on the theme

  26. i love the slow sense of sadness/silence/stillness here, intermingled with the carnival imagery…
    these words:
    “i get caught by fog
    that brings me to the edge

    of things that matter”

    love.

  27. Your poem fits my rainy day perfectly! I wish there were such lights outside my windows. I’m settling for raindrops glistening on fuschia blossoms and buzzing hummingbirds braving the weather to get their sugar rush from the feeder. Thanks for the prompt!

  28. “…i get caught by fog
    that brings me to the edge
    of things that matter, wheels…”

    I love the imaginary journey this poem takes me on! I have always loved the emotion and mystery of fog, how it can make an every day scene into some exciting, mysterious and even slightly scary.

    That you set this piece in fog with the wheels slowly spinning had me loving it and walking along with you.

    Thanks!

  29. This was a lovely write, I enjoyed this sensitivity of this poem and the visual you displayed in my our minds with your creative words.

  30. A SpIiRiTeD ride, Claudia, finding the pulse of the eternal universal fair, the carnival in purgatory, where all language morph into one, where the stairway to heaven and the escalator to hell roll into infinite fog. I, too, love the ferris wheel musculature; thanks. Words are your slaves, and you do crack that poet’s whip.

  31. Claudia, as ever, PURE MAGIC here! I especially loved these lines as so accurately and uniquely descriptive when meeting someone in these flashing lights in busy places at night:
    “candy cotton threads
    glisten like wet cobwebs
    on your lips, silence
    in the corners of your mouth,”

  32. As always Claudia, I love your powerful imagery. It is easy to let fear take over and then everything seems and looks sinister and evil