life’s face phosphorizes ugly
squinched, unhinged & torn
parts of my body
rotting meters deep &
carry grief
in heavy vessels, wounds
fresh & raw with pain, weigh me
shoulders stooped, i
fled here from the city,
drowning in futility & raid, rage
between the dead,
knocking on doors we fight,
tightly locked with steel bolts
hold us until
someone steps
too close and dams burst with
a thunderous crack
face in the mud &
touching floodland,
ripped & split, i’m digging graves
for the pain – less, go, let me -
Go,
I know you can’t see – lies
bouncing back like
moon-pale, off-scale skeletons,
a ghastly army, envision decay,
mission-making-us-think
we already stopped
breathing but we still gasp, lying
on our back
with open mouths, body crinched,
fight until someone
throws us back & hoarse-tongued
clumps glued to my neck,
riding back the roots we came
from
.
my one shot wednesday poem comes straight from the cemetery where i fled to last week…and yes…after all it was a good time..
due to a business trip my commenting will be a bit delayed…
..grab your pen and join the party over at One Stop Poetry…sign up opens 5pm EST
Hi! Claudia…
Your spoken [Even though I was unable to hear your spoken words...Well, I almost did...the words connecting just appeared, but there was no connection...]Never mind because your written words are very powerful today…Their is so many emotions…seeping through your poem…melancholy, rage, reflection, darkness, grief and a sense Of realization.
Thanks, for sharing!
deedee
Oops! I meant to say…“There is so many emotions…”
raw emotion expressed vividly.
beautiful write, Claudia
excellent write claudia…that opening line zings….vivid and intense imagery…the audible crack…sometimes we need that to keep moving…
All I know is that your poem touches me. Maybe it matches my mood right now or maybe there’s always something dark roaming in our souls. Regardless, you speak truth, for us all.
Hope business is as enjoyable as your writing. Take care.
Wow…what a poem and reading….I must agree the first stanza just grabs you and pulls you into the rest of the poem..bravo!
Strong and haunting Claudia, those burdens we carry haunt us, responsibilities we cannot run and hide from. But there’s always some hope x
Intense poem Claudia…I wrote about open wounds today too…vivid and touches my heart..
My favorite line is the off-scale skeletons – great visual
Reading you has got me to thinking that maybe the function of poetry is to take ugly and turn it into beautiful.
A poem without your sound to add to it – ah, I’ve become spoiled with audio…
But an intensely visual piece, Claudia, vivid and haunting, it scoops us up and holds it tight in the outpouring of emotion…
Hope the business trip goes well!
Er, amending that. The audio wasn’t showing up originally, but now it seems to be…odd.
Oh Claudia…you have written pain with exquisite precision..
Outstanding. Love your reading. Raw lines expressed with a commanding voice. Spots of eloquence admin horror.
“amid”
your work is such an adventure… takes me to an abstract scene everytime… this time a haunting, and as always, a uniquely told story that grabs me by the neck!
Oh, how you paint pictures with your words, vivid, intense pictures that leave me thinking…Excellent in every way
I dig how consonant heavy this is. I feel a lot of “k” sounds, which reminds me of crunching leaves. Excellent flow and word texture.
And you were calling mine grim? At least I provided antiseptic and plastic gloves. ;_) This is seriously good, heavy with the feel of frustration, of the push and pull and fray of emotions that wear and pierce. Fine writing, my friend.
Wow the emotions ran high in this piece
Unable to cease
As you paced them all the way through
Enjoyed this onestop by you
Beautiful reading of a very emotional piece….long may they live!
Sometimes I hesitate to reply to a real poet like you… because this is just too good for me. But, I cannot believe the effect you have on me with the sound of your voice. Especially when you say “too close” and “let me go.” The pleading child-like voice is real. I cannot help but understand how our wounds do come back to life and haunt us, no matter how deep we bury them. … sadly amazing.
Amazingly emotive. Nice to find someone who adds audio to their poetry. It has such a profound effect!
I’ve read this a few time and these lines stick with me:
“someone steps
too close and dams burst with
a thunderous crack
face in the mud”
I love it when lines stick.
I love to read, listen, read, listen to your pieces…you weave words wonderfully, this no exception. The opening couplet in this piece really powerful to the flow and tone. Enjoyed this piece ~ Rose
Powerful write, as always, Claudia. The first two stanzas are simply amazing in punch, delivery…excellent ~
This came staight from your inner being…love the raw feel of it…this type of poetry is so real and truthful…thank you..bkm
So fabulous. The emotional power of this is incredible. The last two stanzas absolutely blow me away.
An artist. I love your flow, use of words, sounds, symbols. And then you capture me through out. Our roots. That should be a prompt someday. Excellent as always.
http://henryclemmonspoet.blogspot.com/2011/06/foxglove-white-one-shot-wednesday.html
WOW!
That was one emotional ride. Beautifully narrated. The echo does the piece a great justice.
Such an emotional poem. Touched by it…
eye for an eye
This is really gut-wrenching, raw, tell-it-like-it-is poetry. Spectacular.
Your read elucidates the poem so much better than just reading it. I got the grittiness of it, and felt the war of death and life and the bitterness and ugliness of losing. Excellent, as always, Claudia.
I read so many layers into this raw, emotion-filled poem, Claudia. It’s relevant in so many ways. One of my favorites of yours.
This feels really raw and real. Fine writing, Claudia.
Claudia!! This is so emotive and each time I read it, I’m glued to the screen, your scenes pulling me in like disasters on the news, only this is so much closer than a screen; you squelched the slippery, thick mud of reality into my head – images heavy, wet, and desperately sad, mad, overwhelmed, and wasted. Wow. Fabulous writing.
Extremely powerful imagery. So much pain. We think the grass is greener on the other side, and maybe it is, until the rains come and come and come. Nice One Shot!
Wow…the accompanying audio brings an immense vividness to your words…powerful piece.
haunting and powerful … loved hearing you.
moon-pale, off-scale skeletons, – love that
great piece Cloudy xx
i love pieces that explore the dark side of our conditions. who hasn’t fled here from their city? i have, and certainly will again, seems to me.